Progress

snowbike

My new bike meets an early winter storm… This last week has been difficult in many ways.  I watched this storm blow in from the “comfort” of my hospital bed.  Being sick is no different for anyone I suppose, we reject the imposition.  We have things to do! for heaven’s sake.  But that time has passed… the snow storm has blown over and fall has returned with milder weather and falling leaves.  My storm has passed as well, though I still am watching the aftereffects.  I can breathe easier, literally and figuratively.  I have an appetite again, though eating less was probably good for me!  My blood is thinner… thanks to drugs.  Ever given yourself a shot in the belly twice a day?  I didn’t enjoy it.  The first time was the hardest, the others I just positioned the needle and then looked away.  I have rather impressive bruises around my belly button because after all the stuff thins your blood, so of course you bruise at the injection site.  After giving thousands of shots over the years to cattle, it still makes you think twice when it is your fat little belly you are poking with that needle!!  Coumadin, aka rat poison, is now my only drug… 4 pills at 5 pm.  Remember that… remember that.  My brain seems to focus again.  I even got creative with my jack-o-lantern Friday.  Before that I was hard pressed to finish a magazine article or sudoku (thanks, Mary Jo and Kirk, I’ll probably never finish that book full of Sudoku though!)  I’m not as paranoid as I was with every little ache or pain, but I’m also moving more, so I don’t get sore.  The Ten Sleep ambulance crew was great, bringing Vernon and I supper enough for 6 people… I received 5 gorgeous bouquets… and my Mom sent me a card that made me cry. I had a couple of good friends that let me cry on their shoulders, just cause I needed to.  Emails and phone calls made me thankful for caring friends.
So, the storm is gone.  It left behind frozen leaves and broken branches and a good inch of moisture that is always welcome in Wyoming.  My storm has left, leaving me more alert to signs of blood clots.  Leaving me very grateful that I was spared from death for whatever reason.  Leaving me satisfied with my position in life, that though my choice would not be to go now, at least I believe my family would handle it.  Leaving me happy to complain about politics and finances and other less annoying details of everyday life.  I am making progress and thank everyone who helped me in whatever way.  To steal a good friend’s motto AGAIN… LIFE IS GREAT!

 

An addendum

OK, remember my pityparty???  No cake, no balloons…???  Well, I’ll tell you this much.  Saturday I went on a bad ambulance call. I’m not really used to those, and I’ll leave it at that.  Sunday I had chest pain.  Monday I had light headedness (no, not because I am blonde).  Tuesday I could NOT breathe.  Wednesday I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with multiple PEs.  That’s Pulmonary Embolisms… lots of ’em.  Blood clots, folks.  I was feeling crappy because I was doing crappy… And here I am on Friday, thankful to be here… Two days of tests and shots and pills and hospital sleep cycles *meaning little sleep* and I am doing so much better than that family on Saturday or another family early this morning… and to steal one of my best friends’ mantras **** LIFE IS GREAT!****

Teach me, Dally

I had a not so great weekend.  For many reasons I’ll refrain from sharing the details with you… I mean, sincerely, that I *can’t* share them.  Take my word for it… Saturday basically sucked.  Sunday was worse on a personal level.  Monday, today, was better news, but I still felt yucky, weird, unusual, different, how many adjectives would you prefer?  So, as I continued with my little ol’ pity party that I was having by myself… pity parties, I hate ’em, no balloons, no cake, no ice cream… I decided to UNhave my pity party!  How you ask?  By doing something with my dogs!  My saviors, my friends.  It’s dark, I still don’t feel *right*, so I go to my “AwesomeNewMacComputer” (you’ve got to say it all at once!) and looked at my recent photos.  And here I found Miss Dally.

Bridge1

See her?  I’m on the sheepbridge, a rather scenic bridge actually built so sheep don’t have to cross the creek and get their wool wet!  Those sheep are long gone.  Those ranchers, unfortunately, don’t own that ranch anymore.  Abandoned and lonely, their sheep bridge’s sole purpose is to give me a great picture or two every year.  But look closely.  That flick of a tongue reflects her nervousness.  She wants to be *on* the bridge not standing on the 8″ of board on the *outside* where she is.  Lucas figured out how to go around the wire panels on the end and join me.  Dally wasn’t paying attention, so there she is.

bridge2

Attempt #3 or was it #4?  She tries to squeeze through to get to us, but either her courage leaves her or her back feet slip off those 8″ I was telling you about.  She’s not comfortable doing this.  She doesn’t want to do this.  She’s nervous.  If I were her I’d puke.  No, honestly, I’d cry.  Put me in a situation I feel uncomfortable in and I cry.  Anyone else do that? Please? Please?  Whatever… I cry at commercials and movies and books and in doctor’s offices.  But ignore my psychological problems… look at dear Dally and what she does next.

bridge3

ATTA GIRL!  She did it.  She overcame and succeeded.  Kapla!  
 

bridge4

Now look at that swagger.  She accomplished something.  She figured out her own way.  She didn’t need help from anyone and found out that it was inside her to succeed all along.

bridge5

And in the end, there is NOTHING like snuggling next to someone who supports you and loves you.  She never came clear across the bridge to me the human.  Daddy was good enough for Dally.

Dally taught me a few things.  That my pity parties can always be rescued by my dogs.  That independence can carry us through and should.  That those who love us, truly love us, will always support us NO MATTER WHAT.  Thanks, Dally Girl, you’re a good teacher.  For those of you against anthropomorphizing animals… ppppllllll! Leave me and my psychological problems alone… I’m happy!

 

Vlog

Aspenroad

A vlog for those of you out there that don’t know… and I was a partner in crime with you until recently… is a video blog entry.  I’ve been playing with my new computer, a 24″ Mac, (I know, I know, but I LOVE it!!!)  and when I posted a video on YouTube the other day about Dally, I received many great compliments about it.  But the only people that knew about it were my English Shepherd friends.  Surprisingly… now get this… most English Shepherd owners don’t live in Wyoming or on a cattle ranch!  Amazing.  Doesn’t *everyone* live out in the boonies with 3 English Shepherds????  You mean people actually live in humongous cities and on Midwestern farms?  I thought that was just made up in Hollywood!

OK, don’t get offended, I was born with sarcasm in my blood.  It can’t be helped.
So, to share with my 6 blog friends… I am posting the addresses of my new videos on YouTube.
The first one is the latest one… A virtual cowboying trip as we trailed our cows off the mountain Wednesday.  It is 8 minutes long, but, hey, you’re asking me to condense 8 hours of cowboying!  For those of you that have helped shove all our cattle up the “hill” – the reverse of this video – you might be amazed at how easily those lone cows can fall off the mountain without their calves and with no yearling steers to get in the way…
The second is Dally’s video I made.  It shows her working alongside her dad Lucas and Boomer.  It was just her second time out working… and she did alright.  I think she’ll make a cowdog!
I hope you enjoy these as much as my English Shepherd friends seem to…
 
 

Exertional Rhabdomyolysis

Bridge-dog

On a great day, Lucas strikes a pose…
Sounds yucky, huh?  Well, I can attest with my hand over my heart, tears in my eyes, and a sinking heart, that it is much more than yucky to witness.  What is it?  Basically it is when your dog works too hard, add a dose of dehydration, add a hot day, add an unsuspecting owner, and there you have it.  What your mind tells you is a dying dog.  A dog that doesn’t drink.  A dog that can’t seem to catch his breath and pants and pants and pants until you can’t hardly bear it anymore.  A dog that lays flat out on his side and you think – This is IT.  A dog that still manages to mark bushes as we limp past, which brings a smile of sorts to your face, until your realize the urine is red.
That was Lucas yesterday after we brought our cows off the mountain.  He was tired.  I knew he would be… but I wanted it to be him that taught Dally her first few times on cattle.  He had brushed up, his typical maneuver on warmer days and long trails when his legs just give out on him.  Nothing unusual.  I had made sure he’d been drinking and had packed water for him from the last spring as I knew it’d be a long dry way home.  But once we had achieved our destination, he quit.  I mean, he didn’t want to move.  Vernon had ridden off to check the ram pump.  I told Johnny to go ahead, that we’d be along, I wasn’t too concerned, even getting home after dark wouldn’t be that bad.  But a few hundred yards into this plan, I knew something was different.  Lucas was way more than tired.  I wracked my brain trying to figure out alternative plans.  I didn’t have my cell phone.  Strike one.  I couldn’t put Lucas on my saddle, 65+ pounds up that high?? and then, climb up to hold him, and hope he didn’t jump and Tart wouldn’t buck??? Strike two.  Carry him in some sort of sling?? Please, I grunt when I load him in my Durango, much less miles off the hill.  Strike three.  So we did the best we could.  We’d meander to the next cedar tree.  Rest.  Meander to the next cedar tree.  Rest.  Meander.  Rest. Meander.
We made it to the bottom of the mesa, to the road, to the quiet, still, unbusy, red powdery dusty road.  I was hoping someone would drive by and I’d beg them to take Lucas home.  Even neighbors I’m not on the best of terms with would have been victims of my pleas at that point in time.  No one came.  So we meandered.  He seemed to be doing better now that sundown was upon us and the cool air was refreshing.  But lo! in the distance I hear a quiet familiar roar.  In moments my knight in shining armor arrives on the 4 wheeler bringing a granola bar, Pepsi and a jug of water.  I grabbed the jug and poured Lucas a drink.  Mercy me, he drank!  We switch modes of transportation, and with Lucas balanced in front of me and Dally clinging on behind, I putt putt for home.  We make it.  Lucas drinks and eats and begins to recover.
I don’t ever want to do that again!  He has fully recovered.  Maybe I’ll learn and not take him on long trips.  Maybe he can teach Dally on an outreach program…